Understand this about men: they will usually do the least that they can to maintain their relationship. But here’s the real problem: there are women everywhere who are complete suckers for this crap.

So if he can text you at 11pm on Friday night after a week of silence and charm you with something like: “UR 2 hott! Maybe it’s a low self esteem thing, but as long as some desperate girl lets him get away with it, he’ll always have a low-maintenance sexual outlet.

How are you supposed to progress the relationship if you never “touch-base” by actually speaking to one another? Or, am I just old fashioned (39) and not used to this new aspect of dating? Telling someone where you’re located in a crowded theater or bar. There’s no context, tone, voice, or facial expressions to modify your message. You’re encouraged to misspell, you’re discouraged from saying anything deep or meaningful.

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Therefore, he’ll never feel the need to do all the heavy lifting of relationships such as “calling” and “dates”….

But the truth is, Rikki, you don’t need men who won’t call you. If he’s a good man who is genuinely interested in you, he will make the kind of effort that reveals this.

Nothing will turn off a guy faster than: “I HATE TEXTING.

IF YOU THINK THAT LITTLE OF ME, GO TAKE A HIKE, DOUCHEBAG!

” Try to redirect his energy in a positive way that encourages him to keep working for you.

As long as he’s working for you, you’re still in control.

What you don’t want to do is sound like a stick-in-the-mud, my-way-or-the-highway woman.

But you can refuse to play his game and still make him feel attractive, which will keep him chasing you through whatever medium you choose. Now now, don’t hate on men – I’m a single guy who is dating, and women I meet text me all the time. It drove me crazy for some of the reasons you talked about – a 5 minute phone call is so much nicer, more respectful, more intimate. It’s how Gen-Y communicates (I’m older than Gen-Y.) I finally decided to stop resisting it, and it doesn’t bother me anymore.

If five minutes on the phone is too much work for him, it speaks for itself.

As to how you redirect a lazy man to give you more effort, the trick is to do it with wit and charm.

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